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Original: 7/24/2007 10:52 AM
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Tuesday, July 24, 2007

I'm losing my effing mind...

 

A long belated post from my trip in China.

The 40 days was awesome!!  Tibet was fun... despite spending half if on a train there and the other half looking at Tibetan temples!  It was soo pretty though.

Xi'an was kind of a disappointment.  Spent majority of the time looking at old ancient chinese artifacts from various time periods.  might i add those artifacts were (ceiling, wall, floor pieces/ or pots and pans).  The Stone Warriors were pretty cool and so was mountain climbing one of the steepest mountains in the world.  (it was basically like climbing a ladder).  ><

JuZhaGuo was pretty.  Lakes, rivers, mountains and trees plus blue skies (kind of rare in China with its insane number of people) but it got boring after spending less than 10 hrs there.  It was basically same thing over and over again.

The other half of the time I spent with family- eating out, shopping (too much clothes shopping), watching tv, or admiring houses <= that's a big thing with my relatives. 

 

China was fun.  Everyday kept me occuplied.  Now I'm bored and losing my mind.  I spend everyday doing nothing... it's causing me to have bad BAD thoughts about next year...

it hasn't helped everywhere I've gone in china... my relatives are worried that I'm going so far away without really knowing anyone... haven't even seen the campus yet.  >_<  Not to mention never been that far away without parental supervision. 

 

I swear.  I think reality is hitting me... since I have nothing to do right now but ponder.  AHH!!  Will I fail?   It doesn't help when i look at my schedule and see all the classes i have to take (math, physics, chem, chem lab, humantities, p.e., frontier semiar class and maybe foreign language elective)  >.<  that's like 7 maybe 8 classes!  AHH!! 

Then the whole dorm thing... what if I don't like my room mate?  what if we don't get along?  maybe i'll get a singles room... but what if i get a triple room? 

it doesn't help we're flying to vegas... then driving to pasadena.  thus i can't really bring much.   >_< 

Then the fact i won't know anyone.  T.T  It's been 7 years since I've been in this position.  For 7 yrs i've found and established my comfort zone... found a place.  Now I have to start from scratch... what if I don't fit in?  what if I find out after 4 yrs I despise science and math?  then what am I suppose to do?   then there's my friends now... what if we grow apart... what if i get overly homesick... i can't really come home til mid december.  what if i'm miserable for 2 and half months. 

 

I swear... being alone in this big house without anything to do... it's really affecting my mind. 

Oh yeah. Hp7 was really good.  Though the ending.... err was...  last ch seemed off.  The last phase of the book appeared maybe rushed/ logic not her typical logic.    Won't go further not want to ruin it for anyone. 

 

Signing out...

 Posted 7/24/2007 10:52 AM - 3 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment

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Visit brianbsquared's Xanga Site!

Pep talk time.  First of all, don't take 7-8 classes.  Wait on the foreign language for now.  You have 4 whole years and it looks like you're trying to load everything up into 3. 

Second, follow what you love doing...enough said

Third, your friends are closer than you think.  New technology today has made it nearly impossible to not keep in touch with people.  Khasim and I still babble on xanga, Amin and I keep up every now and then over AIM, Shawn and Cassy and I have hung out a few times and chatted by phone.  You learn really fast who your close friends are when you move away...and you have a great group of friends (trust me, I know most all of them from some way or another).

Finally, and this is most important, but make the most of where you go.  Yes, you are going far away from Houston, and yes, it sounds scary.  But be yourself and you are bound to meet people up in California.  Trust me...you will do it.  Just remember all these things and you will do fine.  You'll find that you learn more outside your classes around others instead of in the classroom (not taking anything away from class, but you're not supposed to be there 40 hours a week...only 15-20).

~B^2

Posted 7/24/2007 12:34 PM by brianbsquared - reply


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